Saturday, July 20, 2013

Final Post

Repose (John Singer Sargent)
Am I here already?

Ordinarily I would take this opportunity to analyze and reflect on this experience (I haven't re-read a thing; sorry for the typos--however it's an accurate reflection of this experience), but I've elected not to do that for this final post. I do not mean to imply the juicing itself is unworthy of reflection as it absolutely is and this has been an incredibly fulfilling experience--but I can use my energy in what I hope is a more effective direction. So it makes sense for me, at this moment, to let the old things go.

Learning to let go should be learned before learning to get. Life should be touched, not strangled. You've got to relax, let it happen at times, and at others move forward with it.
Ray Bradbury

As I've prepared for this JF I've learned the fasting itself isn't truly my focal point for development but the process of repatterning and rebuilding myself post fast is. Because this is the trickiest part for me--it is time for me to go off line.

Will I JF again? Most likely. There have been times I felt I had to leave the DC area because my approach to life can be too intense. In the last few days I've received hesitant but kindly-intended, unsolicited (and accepted) advice from several friends that can be translated into the notion that I still have some rough edges to me. In all honesty it seems I am only fit company for friends and family--and I am grateful these wonderful people are able to handle my rough edges without troubles. So, I still have some things to figure out here.

On a similar note my reading (which came a few days after I accepted my new job) predicted this job as where I have work to do--down to the unusual part of the title. I believe in being cautious in accepting guidance, however once my intuition became stronger I became better able to recognize the right guidance by a certain "click." This reading was very powerful and its guidance has been confirmed time and again. So I will explore that I still have some work to do right here. Depending on how much debris I accumulate in all of this will be a good indication of how soon I may JF again.

My vow of acceptance is something I'm almost unable to speak about--it's too encompassing yet it is now engraved in my being. It was challenging but overall a joyful experience. I can say that even though I now release that vow I intend to honor the spirit of it in those things which came to my attention under this JF and that I have not been able to process (aversion books included). A lot of what I seem to do lately is help people loosen or clear up stuck energy. I've noticed in life there are some things that simply resolve themselves and others that require effort to resolve. It's hard to tell the difference. All I know is right here, right now isn't the right space for me.

What's left to say? Probably the most important thing.

If I have caused any harm, please forgive me.

Be well.

No comments: